If you can look this fine when you just woke up, you don’t have anything left to accomplish in this world.

i said 'explain physics to me like youre in love with me' and after a while of quiet he went 'everything sings'. so i get it now

*explaining kitchen appliances to my pet medieval knights* The microwave, or Micheal the Wavious, and metal fork, or Sir Silver Prong, are sworn enemies and can never cross paths lest their meeting spell destruction for all.

i may not be beautiful but at least i know a lot of useless information

this is what my phone recommended to me ....

so it’s a wednesday night in july and you’re at home and you’ve showered and you’ve masturbated and you’ve gnawed at the inside of your mouth and you’ve eaten and washed the dishes and fixed a corner of the fitted sheet on your bed and texted your grandmother and thought positive thoughts and still the feeling comes. what then

in the evil world beanie babies would be called meanie babies

i love that i can just start off sentences with phrases like “in the evil world” and not elaborate at all, because people just get what i mean. like yeah yeah, the evil world, we all know it. the world thats just like ours but evil. we’re all familiar. 

Antblr

🐜 ᵃⁿᵗ⁷¹² ᶠᵒˡˡᵒʷ
ᶠᵒᵘⁿᵈ ᵃ ˢᵘᵍᵃʳ
🐝 walter-wasp Follow
Nice i am going to eat it i think :3
🐜 ᵃⁿᵗ²⁷³⁶ ᶠᵒˡˡᵒʷ
ᵏʸˢ
🐜 ᵃⁿᵗ⁵⁴⁷⁶ ᶠᵒˡˡᵒʷ
ᵏʸˢ
🐜 ᵃⁿᵗ⁷⁵⁴³ ᶠᵒˡˡᵒʷ
ᵏʸˢ
🐜 ᵃⁿᵗ¹⁵⁹⁶ ᶠᵒˡˡᵒʷ
ᵏʸˢ
🐜ᵃⁿᵗ¹²⁸ ᶠᵒˡˡᵒʷ
ᵏʸˢ
🐜ᵃⁿᵗ⁷¹⁹⁶ ᶠᵒˡˡᵒʷ
ᵏʸˢ
² ᵇᶦˡˡᶦᵒⁿ ᵐᶦᶜʳᵒˢᶜᵒᵖᶦᶜ ⁿᵒᵗᵉˢ

꧁★꧂

If someone ever was sucking my strap I would be able to feel it due to my delusional and hypochondriac nature